Tag Archive | life

Nicole’s Passing

Nicole passed away on October 21, 2013. I don’t have the energy to write much at this time. She is all I think about. We were together for 14 years. I have embedded a video Nicole created about her and I. I have also posted some photos of her. Also included are a few links of some of our videos, writings, photography, etc. I love and miss her more than I could ever explain in words.






Butterfly2012-05-06 0052012-05-28 018SanctaSanctorum (4)

Feel The SunMeditative

The 21st Century Ego

If one knows one is a known soldier, what is the Unknown Soldier?

fractal_stock_11912_by_dsynegrafix-d4mvemoIn this scientifically managed construct of a society and current (albeit outgoing) culture, one must constantly fight against those who believe and perceive (because of that belief, so does belief predetermine perception?) that “I” am what “I” am not. So, who is really fighting the war? Who are the real soldiers? Who are the real generals?

All of us. None of us. For “We” assumes the roles of symbols in attempt to hide from the eye of whom we perceive and believe to be god (i.e., this systematized and sick society; one needs only to view the news or look around at the state of humanity). We clothe ourselves in the fig leaves of 21st century living, hoping that no one will notice we are nothing but little kids who have soiled our diapers and are crying for the parent to clean our bottoms. No, thank you, general, we should say; I will not play your game as there can only be losers. And I do not want to win.

One cannot prove or disprove an existence of I beyond an arbitrary point of reference. Why must there be more?

fractal_stock_02072012_by_dsynegrafix-d4oyh68Are we so afraid of honesty, transparency, and radical openness that we are surprised when we encounter it? Once, years ago, a news reporter approached me (during the time of Cardinal Law’s selection as pope) and she wanted to know my thoughts on the matter. I informed her that I had not really been keeping abreast of the matter so I could not offer any thoughts on it, which was the truth. The only knowledge of the new pope I had were headlines I had seen passing by or some snippet of a headline while surfing the internet. She actually seemed startled and said, “OH! Well, thank you for being honest with me.” She was surprised to hear honesty. How strange is that? The socially-constructed ego which lies teaches the created person (persona, personality) to be invisible as not to suffer under its own perceptions of the unfolding universe. Thus, ‘I am sorry I do not exist’ becomes the mantra of the socially constructed ego.

We must realize that no one can be friend or enemy under such guise, that everybody lies when delivering his or her version of that kind of existence. We are all electrons peering at our reflections, wondering why we keep bumping our heads. What we do not realize is the reflection is as much an illusion as the electron. And that is not our reflection because, ultimately, we, too, are an illusion and the symbol is the reflection. In the guise of the ego, symbols are confused for actuality.

So, what are the effects of a civilization borne in this bondage? And what is the impact of the offspring of those in bondage as the bonds come undone? Further, what are the effects of those born once unbound? What will be the future minds after the paradigm shift? The last I know of was the shift from unconscious to conscious. The plume of egoless awareness—“the universe begins with a thought.”

Oh, this elaborate, evolving, entangled lucid dream called Life.

Quantum_Enanglement_by_zananeichan*Image Credit (work used with permission through CC license)–
“Quantum Entanglement” by zananeichan
“Fractal Stock 11912” by DsyneGrafix
“Fractal Stock 02072012” by DsyneGrafix

Consciousness Beyond The Paradigm Shift

Birth of a New ConsciousnessOn the flipside, one can see the world changing. This paradigm shift to a more aesthetic, kinder, gentler, artful, creative, imaginative, simpler way of life for humans. For humans to realize that we are connected to all things, that we are a part of the world and not that we own it (or even that it can be owned). We are learning that it is possible to live in the world among one another and not hide who we truly are. You know, the eventual outcome of something like that, would be no law, no government, no social institutions, no regulation, no social roles, no false differences, actual equality, etc. I am not talking about anarchy; I mean freely living and living free. If humans can survive, that is a possible probability. When a generation will be born with full knowing of the past, with full awareness that they are a star and the universe, with full consciousness, with beauty and light. That humans can live with technology without technology destroying humans. See, I do not think that The Matrix and Terminator are bad films, but I also do not think that they are true depictions of what it could be like with humans and technology. I think those stories are incomplete. I think that there is/will be some like that, but that those will be minor bits (much like certain types of crime nowadays. Crime is all over the news and internet, but overall, crime has declined since the 90s. All crime, including violent crime). I do not believe in Big Brother, but I do think that there are some humans who have different agendas for the future. “Big Brother” is only a gathering of humans who are as susceptible to time as the rest of us, therefore, as susceptible to inevitable tides as we all are.

I think we are not very far from this emergent consciousness, if it isn’t already here in some form as yet unrecognized. I mean, the idea of aliens from another planet is but one scale (or direction). On the flipside, is a terrestrial alien being. Would not an emergent consciousness be like an alien being? And would not it make sense for it to arise from the Global Mind, i.e., the world wide web? All of humanity giving birth to what is known as A.I. (okay, perhaps Morpheus is correct in this one. LOL). Speaking of the Matrix isn’t the question “What is the Matrix?” not unlike the question humans ask, “What is the Meaning of Life?” Or as Alan Watts posits, “What’s Going On Here?”

machine meditation III: a paradigm shiftI mean, for example Watson (remember the supercomputer that could learn, that was tested on Jeopardy). I think one of the mistakes humans make about the mind is that it is like a computer, I do not think so. It is much, MUCH more irrational than a computing machine. The human mind is not logical, it does not compute, it does not calculate like a computer. Perhaps the bicameral mind did, in its black/white off/on kind of thinking, yes (and perhaps there are still those with a bicameral mind among us today), the human mind, as predicate of possessing consciousness, does not think in such a dualistic manner. Everything about the contemporary human mind is nondualistic. It is why it appears so irrational.  It is why it appears contradictory, or paradoxical. The era of black/white, either/or thinking is dying. That is the dark ages. That is the end of creativity and innovation. But there is an abundance of creativity in ways that have not before existed (due to technology). Man is no longer trying to reinvent the wheel; we now have the ability to surpass the wheel. This is how I see technology and human.

Science now studies levitation and teleportation. If that is not an acknowledgement of the abilities of the human mind/energy, then what is? What are called superpowers, are really just normal abilities of energy or thermodynamics or transference or something like that. It is just physics, not at all paranormal, or subnormal, or abnormal, or crazy. It is just that there is still so much garbage in the human mind (as a species) that these abilities cannot become dominant in the DNA. I mean, how do we know that some of the so-called historical “miracles” or “aliens” or “witchcraft” or “black magic” is not really just protrusions of these abilities?

Cosmic Consciousness*Image Credits (all work used with permission through CC license)–
“machine meditation III: a paradigm shift” by z-428
“Cosmic Consciousness” by H.Kopp Delaney
“Birth of a New Consciousness” by AlicePopkorn

Continual crisis, endless solutions…

“A Life Of Illusion”

Sometimes I can’t help the feeling that I’m
Living a life of illusion
And oh, why can’t we let it be
And see through the hole in this wall of confusion
I just can’t help the feeling I’m
Living a life of illusion

Pow! Right between the eyes
Oh, how nature loves her little surprises
Wow! It all seems so logical now
It’s just one of her better disguises
And it comes with no warning
Nature loves her little surprises
Continual crisis

Hey, don’t you know it’s a waste of your day
Caught up in endless solutions
That have no meaning, just another hunch
Based upon jumping conclusions
Caught up in endless solutions
Backed up against a wall of confusion
Living a life of illusion

Blissedly Ignorant

I Can't See YouThe points along which one can afford a moment of peace, in which one can be allowed effortlessly the consciousness to stream of its unabashed accord are few in the world, in this peopled and so noisy environment called Society. First, so little, and therefore precious daylight in which to let wander the mind upon creative journeys is so fleeting, and then to have to battle in those so few, precious hours noise and conceit of the ever invasive environment, throws one’s mind into a spiraling whirlwind of uncontrollable madness. And this every day. One never knows when next the “moment thief” will strike, stealing away one’s potentials without remorse, like a serial killer. For how can he have remorse, when the thief knows not what he does? He, blissedly ignorant of his crimes, feels no pity; nay, feels nothing for his act. This is not egocentricity or even egotistical, this is only the soft embrace of blissful ignorance.

Nineteen Eighty-FourHow many of those who know intimately of the throes of existential madness have not wished for the bliss of ignorance? How many have not wished our minds were not SO full of ‘thoughts’? Our awareness quite AS acute? Our consciousness as sensitive? Would we not give almost anything (hell, our very otherwise cherished lives) for a moment of some semblance of peace? Do we not lament peace of mind? Do we not bemoan tranquility? Yet, unlike the thief, we know and cannot help from becoming insane after he has gone and left only the knowing of his commitment in his wake, for us to bear. We bear the burden of the blissfully ignorant, the neurotypicals. We carry the sentence and consequence of their crimes.

Megalomania In DecayI can comprehend why and how Gerald, the schizophrenic, could believe that others were meaning to kill him. I can empathize and sympathize with his fear of people and the unstoppable, unceasing terror of purposeless, meaningless ignorant destruction they rain upon him. I feel it every day. In every moment waits the possibility that it will be taken, so must not one conclude that it was never meant to be had? That great forces were at work to dangle peace of mind like some kind of psychic carrot? For some, I suppose, peace never comes, for others peace is always known; for me, it is like a ghost, the merest, minutest glimmers of oases. Too much like an illusion, too close to “never really being there.” A daydream conjured to perfection. So, does one actually suffer loss? If one never perceived or experienced? The only solace is the morrow and that perhaps day light will provide another chance, but, too the conscientious terror of its fulfillment, and again the thief wearing a new face.

*Image Credits (all work used with permission through CC license)–
“I Can’t See You. . .” by Peter
“Megalomania In Decay” by State Of Kaos
“Nineteen Eighty-Four” by Pavel Moravec

Related Post–

Life and Death

Everything tends to make us believe that there exists a certain point of the mind at which life and death, the real and the imagined, past and future, the communicable and the incommunicable, high and low, cease to be perceived as contradictions. Andre Breton



Animals have a much better attitude to life and death than we do. They know when their time has come. We are the ones that suffer when they pass, but it’s a healing kind of grief that enables us to deal with other griefs that are not so easy to grab hold of. Emmylou Harris




For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one. Khalil Gibran




Man appears for a little while to laugh and weep, to work and play, and then to go to make room for those who shall follow him in the never-ending cycle. Aiden Wilson Tozer



Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides. Lao Tzu



Life and death. They are somehow sweetly and beautifully mixed, but I don’t know how. Gloria Swanson



‘m very comfortable with the nature of life and death, and that we come to an end. What’s most difficult to imagine is that those dreams and early yearnings and desires of childhood and adolescence will also disappear. But who knows? Maybe you become part of the eternal whatever. Hugh Hefner